Something New I Learnt Today…

I must share that I had a fabulous day. It’s a wonder what a little me-time can do. Headed out to the pool to catch some sun then it was off to the mall where I spent 70 dollars on basics such as tank tops, t-shirts and sweats (all varying in the colours of blue, black, white and grey), I’m losing my colour touch! But sometimes essentials are essentials. And then had afternoon tea and caught up on monthly magazine reads.

Teen Vogue, Yoga Journal and Self. I read NYLON regularly too but couldn’t find it on the racks today! Any case, love Teen Vogue for their insight to street style and hot upcoming fashion icons. Yoga Journal because there is always something I can relate to, and Self for their great insight on tips on how to integrate fitness into your daily life including nutritional tips. So what are your monthly reads?

There was an article in this issue of Yoga Journal that really helped me with all that icky stuff I’ve been feeling over these last weeks. It was entitled ‘The Lightness of Being’, an article written by Alison, a freelance writer for the New York Times. It was enlightening to read someone’s journey through her weight loss and realise that there are people who feel just the same way as I do.

Alison lost a total of 87 kgs in a few months and before she knew it once the pounds came off, the compliments started coming in, and everyone always asked her, “it feels great doesn’t it?” She methodically thought out her diet plan, tracking her daily activity including the amount of exercise she did in a day, relative to the calories she took in each day, making her a constant worrier who has always feeling insecure about something she didn’t feel right. When the compliments came in or when she was asked how good it must feel, she always thought that she should be feeling elated, joyful… happy. But she can’t help but to feel lost, like she didn’t know what she needed to feel because the change came too fast, too quickly and all of a sudden, she’s caught up in this routine of having to exercise, eat healthy, and just never stop. She signed up for her first yoga retreat and the instructor told the class to “trust your body, listen and be aware” and she smirked, “how can she trust her own body?” She was the one who made it what it is! And everytime each class ended with Savasana (Corpse Pose – A relaxation pose that ends off each session in yoga), instead of feeling relaxed and rejuvenated, she realised the sad truth – She hated her own body. Soon, she took the time to meditate, feel and put her thoughts down in her journal. Slowly she progressed, she learnt to sync her emotions and her poses together, feeling each and every muscle. And in one momentous yoga class, her instructor told the students to surrender their bodies, surrender themselves to the earth. As she did her forward bend, she finally felt like she could let go.

I was so inspired by this story. Because it reminds me of my own journey. Like Alison, I lost a lot of weight. Fast. And yes, the compliments come in, the waist got smaller and no doubt, it did feel good. But only for awhile. Then it became this endless cycle, eat, exercise, eat, exercise. I was constantly mapping out meals each day. I remember my friends used to tell me, “Jo, you’re only eating 5 carrot sticks a day!” and I was insecure, I needed to be in control of what I was eating and how I was eating. My first journey with yoga came April 2007 when my brother had signed me up for a gym that offered free yoga classes. My first class was hard. I was totally stiff, having ran a million miles due to my efforts to lose weight. Doing a downward dog pose was hurting my calves and I could barely touch the floor with my fingers during forward bend. But at the same time, I felt liberated and calm. And with practice, I felt a difference emotionally. Physically I felt strong, and emotionally, I felt liberated. Today I was reminded of how I feel about yoga and how it feels after each class. I haven’t been able to do yoga frequently these days, only a few classes a week, which could be the reason behind my lack of energy and lack of enthusiasm for life and other things. Now I am reminded , every time I go for a class, I look forward to getting on the mat and enjoying every second and minute of that hour long class. My time in Rishikesh (the holy city of India) was one of the best moments of my life, learning yoga at the heart of it all. I can’t wait to go back.

Here’s a thought. If you don’t do yoga, that’s okay. But I encourage you take a moment each day doing some light stretches. And while you do them, feel the tension releasing through your breaths, feel your muscles, how each slight movement can change how you feel altogether. Bring awareness to your body, half an hour is all you need, that is all you need to make a change.